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FROM THE EDITOR'S PEN  / Lament N o More /   Editorial List

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Lament No More

In last week's column, A Loved One's Lament, I wrote about a husband and wife I met while speaking at an event in Waco Texas. In their situation, like so many others, the roles one plays when a loved one is ill are often not so easily defined.  Am I her caregiver, or loving spouse?  Am I to be cared for, or be a partner in my own care, as much as possible?  Obviously these are not issues inherent in all care issues, such as caring for a loved one with advanced Alzheimer's disease, but it is a topic which does come up more than you would imagine. 

As usual,  I received positive responses when asking for help in solving this lady's challenges with her overprotective husband.  This, in fact was one of those issues which received a lot of heartfelt and practical solutions.  But, who would have expected any less.

Your responses:


I live with and am the primary caregiver for my 90 yr old mother...continue 

I have found it easier to remember my own worth and value as a member of my family, community, stroke support group, etc...continue

Not all people in need of help from a caregiver are completely incapacitated...continue

I sort of understand where he might be coming from...continue 

I would find out what payoff the husband is getting by "keeping his wife depressed...continue 

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Gary Barg


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