Last week, we spent the day with 350 of our closest friends at the Philadelphia Fearless Caregiver conference. Our Keynote Speaker for the day was the indomitable Della Reese. Before she came down from her suite for her session, I told Della of a fellow angel in the audience and she wanted to give her a hug. So she immediately asked where Yvonne was sitting.

Yvonne lives with her mother in a pretty tough area of town. Yvonne’s mom has congestive heart failure and is living with early onset Alzheimer’s disease. You’d think that Yvonne would have her hands too full to care for anyone else, but you would be wrong.  Yvonne noticed that there were 12 other seniors living on her block with no one to look after them. So on her way home, she makes her rounds to check up on Mrs. Green, Mrs. Simon and her other ten friends. They are grateful and gracious when Yvonne comes to call. Many times she is the only person that each one of them sees that day.  Yvonne told us about how important her relationship is with her mother as well as the twelve seniors on her block and that she knows how important she is to them. Then she disclosed to us that she had recently recovered from two heart attacks and that she was still living with constant stress and worry.  As she spoke, Yvonne brought the room to tears, and just as fast, she had found 349 new friends who were surrounding her with advice, support and a whole lot of warmth. Across the room, a caregiver raised her hand and said that she also lived in Yvonne’s neighborhood and to get away she liked to take bus trips to some of the interesting sites in and around Philly. Later, I noticed her huddling with Yvonne planning the next trip - together.

By the way, Yvonne mentioned that as she was spending the day with us, her mother was in the hospital preparing for surgery. Yvonne said that she would have ordinarily been with her mom throughout the day, but she knew how much she desperately needed the resources and advice to be found at the conference and would go to the hospital after the event was over.   

Even guardian angels understand that they need to care for themselves, too.

Fearless Caregiver Manifesto
PRINCIPLE SEVEN

I will fearlessly care for my physical and emotional health as well as I care for my loved one’s, I will recognize the signs of my own exhaustion and depression, and I will allow myself to take respite breaks and to care for myself on a regular basis.

Gary Barg
Editor-in-Chief
gary@caregiver.com