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One Foot, Other Foot
By Terri Corcoran
(Page 2 of 2)

Throughout the past year of full-time caregiving, I have also become “stuck” many times. I get extremely overwhelmed by the physical demands on me, in addition to all the health care and financial complexities I must deal with and the lack of a real marriage relationship with a sharing partner. I can’t look forward to things getting better, because all the doctors say it will only get worse. I often become mentally paralyzed with grief, fear, anger and frustration to the point that I feel I cannot go on. I sometimes feel I can’t stand one more excruciatingly painful and boring day of this life. I try desperately to find meaning in a marriage in which there is only an occasional emotional connection between my husband and me.

But so far I have survived – as has Vince – and I will continue to get by, but only with the grace and help of God. Without my faith there is no way I could do this life! I have learned that when I do get stuck, I need to stop, drop and pray for help. I ask for patience, endurance, courage, and help getting through the difficulty of the moment. After a while, I find that I can get moving again. My mind calms down and I take the next small step – doing the dishes, laundry, paying bills – whatever God directs me to do. If I can start doing one thing, I get unstuck and can then go on – at least until the next crisis point.

When I think I just can’t do this anymore, I look back over the past year and realize that I have done it and that God has carried me over all the rough spots that I felt I could not surmount. Like Vince, I just need to put one foot in front of the other, and start walking. As the song from Allegro says: “You felt yourself falling/And you put one foot out to save yourself,/And you didn’t fall!…/Say! Maybe if you keep taking steps,/One after the other/One after the other…/Maybe going forward is easier than standing still!”

So, as I say “one foot, other foot,” to Vince, God is also saying those words to me.

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