By Patricia St. Clair
So much has been written about the holiday season as it
pertains to caregivers and those who have had recent losses
in their families. In my opinion, a loss doesn’t need to be
recent to be painful. I believed wholeheartedly that I had
passed the point of emotional meltdown during the holidays,
but today’s events made me face the fact that we may never
move past the memories that are imbedded so deeply within us
that cause our grief to take on new meaning at this time of
year. Initially, I felt guilty for again letting the visual
bonds between family members cause such a deep pain within
my heart. However, I am beginning to realize that the depth
of my pain is in proportion to the depth of the love I felt
for my mother, and that love provided both of us with years
of happiness. I believe that today was a breakthrough for
me, and I wish that all caregivers who are facing a loss
that could plunge them into an emotional abyss would take
advantage of the “here and now” and let your loved one feel
the emotional bond between you. Words don’t come easy to
many, especially words dealing with emotions. No words need
to be said when a hand is laid on a shoulder...when one hand
reaches for another...or when one opens his/her arms to
enfold a loved one in an embrace.
Copyright 2001 Patricia St.Clair is a
freelance writer who writes about caregiving.
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