Gary Barg: Tell me what your personal interest
in hospice really is? Did it
come about from your role in
caregiving for your sister?
Cokie Roberts: No, but I came to understand how
important it is to approach death in
a positive way. I felt very
strongly that this was important to
talk about and very few people who
knew anything about television were
able to talk about it. So,
they came to me, figuring that the
combination of the fact that I had
cared for someone who was dying,
that I could put a television
program on the air, and more
important, get it on the air, was a
good combination. The calls
that come in are just unbelievable.
And they’ve done a very good job of
not only putting together good
people to talk about the different
aspects of death and dying over the
years, but also the taping
throughout the broadcast; it is so
moving. There are times when you’ll
be sitting there on the set with
tears streaming down your cheeks.
GB: There are so many misunderstandings
about hospice in general and I know
that caregivers still misunderstand
hospice. What in particular
would you like to say to help people
understand what hospice really is?
CR: It’s not some dreaded thing. I
think there is a sense that if you
call in hospice, then you might as
well just call the funeral home, and
that’s not the case. Also, I
think that people still really don’t
understand that you don’t have to go
to a building called a hospice.
They need to understand (a) hospice
is not going away, it’s staying
home; (b) that it can last over a
period of months; (c) and that it is
a service—not only for the person
who is terminally ill, but for the
whole family. The family often
needs a great deal more help than
the person who is sick; not only in
terms of care, but in dealing with
death. I’ve found often that
the person who is dying can cope
with it; they’ve caught on, but the
family is just nowhere near where
the dying person is.
GB: You’ve said that caregiving is a
continuum. Can you explain
what you mean by that?
CR: That is the
message I always try to give young
women (I do this at women’s college
graduations all the time): first of
all, don’t think that there is a
period of your life when you’re a
caregiver…When your children are
small. When your parents are
old, whatever it is. What
women do is take care. That’s
what we do. We do a lot of
other stuff, too, but what our
mission on this earth is, as far as
I’m concerned (and I get a lot of
argument on it, but that’s tough) is
taking care. Sometimes, it is
taking care of the planet or the
library or the cultural center or
whatever it is. But usually,
even if that is what a woman’s focus
is, she’s also taking care of human
beings. And it’s not
necessarily just of your own
children when they’re small or when
they’re having problems along the
way or of your own parents.
