Gary Barg:
There’s no formula, but we can learn
from other’s lessons.
Amy Grant:
Absolutely, yes. That’s true of any
hard time. It is our ability
to see whatever it is we’re going
through in a meaningful light.
Otherwise, you just get trapped in
why, why, why, and that’s really
counterproductive. I mean, tears are
essential, but you just can’t stay
there. With my parents, I was
frustrated. My mother fell again in
her own home and we were going
through a Rolodex of caregivers
trying to find the right fit.
Then a friend spoke these words to
me, “Take a deep breath, Amy, and
just remember this is the last great
lesson your parents will teach you.”
That immediately created a framework
for me to say, “Well, you’re right.
This is going to be a lesson in
using my creativity, in listening to
my instincts and to those moments of
inspiration and direction that seem
like they come out of nowhere. And
trusting that, on some level, we’re
all led at different points in our
lives when we have the greatest
need.” It has been an amazing
journey, and I’m so grateful for it.
Gary Barg: So
many people who have never been
caregivers are always surprised
about how caregiving actually brings
people closer to their faith. I was
wondering how caregiving influences
your faith, or vice versa?
Amy Grant: There
is immediacy to caregiving. I think
what I felt with my mother was being
more vulnerable all the way around
when in moments of caregiving with
her. You can’t help but feel
sometimes frustrated, but also an
overriding sense of compassion. If
you read through The New
Testament, there are so
many times in the gospels when just
prior to Jesus performing a miracle
would be the phrase “and moved by
compassion” or “moved with
compassion” or “filled with
compassion.” And I think that the
groundwork for the miraculous and
the setting for spiritual experience
is in the context of compassion.
Gary Barg: What
would be the one most important
piece of advice you’d like to share
with family caregivers?
Amy Grant:
“This, too, shall pass.” Nothing
stays the same. I think,
that’s where the faith element
really comes in. There are so many
moments in a day that no one sees
all of the details of how a
caregiver is extending themselves on
somebody else’s behalf. But God
does, and the way I read my
Bible, it is very clear through
The Old Testament and
The New Testament that God has
always been devoted to the
disenfranchised and the marginalized
people in our community. And I mean,
that’s what Jesus said, this is pure
religion, to take care of widows and
orphans. I think there is an
audience for every one of us in the
details of our lives that nobody
else sees, except God, just the one
that made us. And when we remember
that, it does give value to every
sacrifice that nobody else sees. And
I know it comes back. I don’t know
how, but I know it does.
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