ARTICLES / General / Dealing with Caregiver Guilt /
Other ArticlesBy Malika Brown, MSW, LSW
Caregivers often carry around undeserved guilt,
believing that they aren’t doing enough for
their loved ones. This guilt can make the caregiving
role even more stressful than it already is. One
might ask why a caregiver feels guilty when they’re
doing such a courageous job. Here are some reasons:
Resentment for personal time lost – It’s normal
to feel like you’re missing something when so much
of your time is taken up taking care of someone
else. The caregiver thinks that they shouldn’t feel
this way.
Unresolved issues – Many times, there are issues
stemming from childhood or arguments in the past
that hinder the caregiving process. Many caregivers
feel guilty about this.
Comparing yourself to others – Some caregivers
will look at another caregiver and think that they
could never accomplish what that other person did.
Knowing placement is inevitable – There can be
tremendous guilt involved when a caregiver has to
place their loved one in assisted living or a
nursing home.
Dealing with your own issues
– You may be dealing with personal or health problems yourself, which
takes away from your caretaking responsibilities.
Ways to Cope with Caregiver Guilt
Acknowledge the guilt – It’s normal to feel guilt
from time to time. Once it’s recognized, we are
better able to deal with it.
Look at the bigger picture – Although you may be
stressed with a particular situation now, it will
not last forever. Look at the sacrifices you make
for your loved one and realize that you are doing a
great job.
Accept that you’re human and have flaws – All of us
make mistakes from time to time. Some of us may be
good at the physical aspects of caregiving, while
others may be better able to handle the emotional
toll. Recognize your strengths and don’t focus on
the negative.
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